a little update

Sorry I haven't been blogging on here lately, but I have been on my other personal blog which is good. Monday was really tough, and it ruined my chance to talk to my girl, but I guess I'll have to move on. Nothing really going on much except that I'm having about 10 different heat strokes right now and I can't turn on my a/c unless the woman gives me permission too. I've also been thinking, I am proud of the fact that I don't drink or smoke, but sometimes (especially Monday night) I kind of want to. Not because everyone else is doing it, but because it would help me forget about my problems momentarily and just enjoy myself. I'm hoping I don't start smoking, but if I continue having these bad nights I really feel as though I will start to smoke. 

Seriously tho, I really think she has some sort of mental issue or something. She really is going off right now about taking a 10/15 minute long shower right now and just was banging on the bathroom door about my brother needing to get out so she can go in, when any other time she'd be saying "oh well there's two bathrooms in the house you can use the one in the basement." Shouting about the bathroom isn't anything serious so calm down, like she's really getting riled up over something insignificant. Then when she's shouting it all directs back to my brother and how he messed up in school and then she goes off about that and then finds something she can yell at me about. It's so frustrating, I had a great day at work today and I have to come home to this every day.

talk and feelings

I feel like my life is more boring now than it was before. I have absolutely NO ONE to talk to, the person I used to talk to like everynight stopped talking to me 3 days after my birthday (go me). Let me tell you about the lead up to it, I told ya'll that they said they no longer had feelings like they were before, I tried one last attempt at winning them back and it didn't work (not really surprising cause I had my chance), and I get a boat load of reasons why. "I use to like you so, so, so much but you never liked me back, until now. I wouldn’t say that I am completely over you but for the most part I am. Three months is kind of a long time to like some and not have them return the favour. I don’t know how but you need to stop liking me and try to get over this. Even if I do want something more with you, it just won’t work. On the real, I am 20 and I need SEX." At least I got some honesty. It kind of feels like this real reason came, the last argument and what not happened so that they could be free to do whatever without worrying about what it would mean to me. I mean hey like you said you are 20 and you need sex and a long distance thang probably wouldn't work out, but it'd have been nice to hear before feelings got involved. I mean I am also to blame, idk now that we don't talk at all it just sucks. I miss it.